I am hereby naming this patch of my studio 'My Magic Wall'... I use it to put reminders and also WISHES... e.g.. several months ago I had a little post-it note saying... Bali - Flora Retreat...with the dates... and also California - Color of Woman weekend.. and the dates for that... and I just left them there and carried on with my life. Both of those things have come to HAPPEN... I enjoyed an amazing week in Bali learning about being Bold and fearless from Flora Bowley (May 2013)... and I've just returned from an OUTSTANDING visit to California... where all manner of mystical, and magic and WONDERFUL things happened ... and this is what I had on a slip of paper.. in preparation for this trip... I put it up only a few weeks ago.. a matter of days before leaving ... 
One of the reasons I'm sharing this with you is I've just read Danielle Laporte's most recent newsletter and she is encouraging us to share our GOOD news stories.. happenings, experiences etc. So... I thought.. why not.. it's not to sound like a complete wanker... it's really in celeberation and gratitude and sharing an idea that might just work for you too. Yes... I do write the words "learning and loving, and being loved and seen" because one of my unhelpful patterns or limiting beliefs is one of 'being invisible" so.. the counter point to that is being SEEN! ... ask and you shall receive. :) ... and treat others as you'd like to be treated.. works so well too. I did something I've never done before.. and that's travel across to the other side of the world without having booked all of my accommodation.. and left a couple of nights in the hands of my Muse to help me find a place to stay. It turns out those nights were with an amazing woman who is also doing the Color of Woman teacher training. ... and when i asked for "yummy seats"... would you believe... I had a late flight that was cancelled, so the check-in guy at San Francisco just kindly changed my booking to another flight so I would meet my connecting flight in LA... got there.. a Virgin Au lady was looking for me.. 'I've been tracking you since 5.30pm she said" ... all good... then I go through to the boarding gate and WOAH.. I hear my name over the loud speaker... so I go up there and that guy has also been looking for me.. and so they're all happy.. they found their lost passenger... and.. since I had his undivided attention I said... "ummm, the seat I've been given is a window... I really usually prefer an aisle.. but I can try it out and see if it works out... " ... he looks on his computer and says these MOST AMAZING, GORGEOUS, THANK GOD, AND ALL THE ANGELS IN HEAVEN FOR EVERMORE... "there are no others in that row" ... my jaw dropped... and I touched his hand and said THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH, YOU HAVE MADE MY WEEK! and GLORY BE if I didn't have 3 whole seats TO MYSELF for an almost 14 hour flight!!! It honestly felt like business class to me... and I'd been imagining myself in business class (I played a game with myself... my daughter is learning to drive, so each time she drove us to Brisbane - 1 hour+ drive, I would sit in the back and pretend I was travelling in business class) ... hehe... crazy shit like that works... I'm telling you. :)
While shopping in Haight Street (oh my gosh, check out google images)... I was asking my muse for some lace clothing... I'd tried Maceys and I'd tryed lots of times in Au... well... I found a shop... and bought about 5 lace items.. and they were all $27 each! whaaat? yep. true. A bunch of my paintings sold just before I left so there was plenty of spending money.. I'll do my best to get around to blogging some pics from my trip... ugh... I'm really trying to spend less time on the computer these days... I really got that message loud and clear while I was away from home... I reeeaaaalllly want to be creating and painting more than I'm on the computer... it's IMPERATIVE for my sanity and growth as an artist. (if you follow me on fb i put a few on there already) bye for now, love Denise xo
I arrived in the middle of the night to Swasti Eco Village and the moment I walked into my room I saw a very large Klimt tree painted on the wall.. in fact they were everywhere I looked, Swasti has made a version of it their logo. (I started painting trees like those in 2009 and was mesmerized by their spirals and patterning) ... so I guess that felt like a bit of a nod from the Universe that I was in the right place.   first morning at Swasti Eco Village On the Friday that we were all to gather.. and have an opening dinner that evening... I glanced down from my balcony at some stage to see a bunch of women with suitcases arriving... and it was Flora!! and her buddies from Portland.. Kelly Rae Roberts was amongst them!!! It was so exciting to see two ‘shero’s’ just walking past my line of sight all the way from the other side of the world. (I didn’t get to speak to KRR... I got the feeling she was having a big special time with her friends and I didn’t feel to invade her space... I reeeaaaalllllyy wanted to... and usually I would follow that urge.. but... this time... I didn’t.)  Jackie, Me, Flora ... breakfasting and chats. The opening dinner finally arrived... most of the retreat’ants had arrived from their various places from around the globe... most from USA, and Australia. Bam... all descended on a little resort on an island in Indonesia... we each received a sweet gift on the table, that’s always a great start hah.. presents haha! ... anyhow... chats, eats.. and excitement settling down into .. being there... and we gathered afterwards for an opening circle.. we each had an opportunity to call something in and to let something go.. I called in ‘Bravery’... and let go of ‘my story about not being able to articulate myself well enough’. Flora and Lisa Mae were the most gracious and calm of hosts and I think we all felt completely at ease within a very short time.  I awoke each morning about 6 to gather a cup of tea.. meet at the pavilion to meditate with the group at 6.30.. then meet back there for 7.30am yoga til a bit after 9am. I hadn’t done any yoga classes for a few years and so I was pretty stiff and shaky for much of it... and just plain had to give up on the down dogs they made me feel nauseous and yuck... but yoga is all about honouring your body.. listening in etc. so I kept on showing up each day and really loving the teachings Lisa Mae wove into her class, she’s a delight and a great story teller, she had also bought along an assistant whose gentle hands could sometimes be felt easing our limbs into a more aligned pose.  ... and you might be thinking... WHAT ABOUT THE PAINTING??? yes... I was pretty excited about this too!!! We gathered at about 1.45pm (along with some heavy rain clouds) and were treated to our first session with Flora... she shared some wisdoms and guidance for our week ahead and proceeded to demonstrate how to get our first layer happening. This is a many layered process and boy did I realise how much I dislike the fugly middle layers!!! it was interesting and at times painful to observe my feelings about what I was making on my canvas... and I thought later how this could be of great assistance to others to hear... actually ... EVEN though I am proficient at painting my own style that I have been honing for the last 12 or so years... when it came to immersing myself in Flora’s method... I was really challenged, somewhat lost, floundering and not much as ease with it at all!!! I still have to let that all simmer inside to glean all there is to glean from the whole experience... but these notes are what I am noticing for now.  I did not take naturally to this method of painting... I found it challenging and frustrating and often felt really disappointed with my efforts.. that was a big learning lesson for me.. and taught me a few things and reminded me what it's like for beginners in art... it can be quite scary!!! I also had a realisation that some structure, and clear instruction is super helpful for beginners too... they are then free to take what they will, use what they like, but they feel they are making a choice, not just making attempts and feeling inadequate. Flora's example and encouragement were fantastic, she's a born teacher from what I could gather, I was amazed at how calm and courageous she remained throughout the entire week and her painting demonstrations were sublime to watch.  Making new friends, and time with my Nik was Wonderful.  Flora, Me, Lisa Mae So... what a big week or so it was!!! I suspect it's a gift that will keep on giving... I've met people who will continue to be in my life.. and learned techniques that will take some practice and may also make their way onto my canvas's, who knows.
Ever so grateful... and now that a week has passed since I returned home, I'm feeling a lot better and more integrated... taking yourself right out of your comfort zone can tip the scales out of balance for a few days ya know. bye for now, love Denise xo |
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