With a few hours with the house to myself this morning I set about doing some cleaning up.. and also listened in to a podcast of my favourite blog talk show - Awakenings with Michele Meiche.. it REALLY helps me to not notice that I'm cleaning... trust me I need allll the help I can get in that area because I would rather do anything else much of time. Anyway.. let's not go on a tangent of the boringness of housework. Grateful I have a lovely home, *nods* excellent reframe!.
o o o O o o o
I noticed Flora's pic on her instagram, counting down the hours til she goes to Bali.. and of course it got me to thinking what it would take for an artist to fly all the way down yonder and gather a bunch of keen participants and hold a retreat where we will do some yoga in the mornings and paint in the afternoons.... and what does it mean for me to be joining her in less than two weeks ... I want to be very mindful... well not mind full of crap.. but awareness, readiness, openess to access parts of myself that may not come out to play in normal life situations... that's the gift of retreating... especially in a completely different environment.. and in this case different country!! than my home. I'm already in an aware and receptive state of learning due to the Color of Woman course I'm doing... so this is just more than I can put into words, to have this in the midst of that.
o o o O o o o
Below is a snapshot of the three paintings I'm sending in to the Immanual Arts Festival next week... I have been repainting and finishing them this week.. they are part of series I was excited to begin a bit a while ago... on the chakra's... and it was a time when I was really intent on going within, centering, seeking peace... and lots of solitude.. I really was tickled with Klimt's spiral'y trees and wanted to paint loads of them... I love spirals. The Sacral Chakra, red one has lots of affirmations written in the branches of the tree... yummy grounding energy is evident to me in that one. The 'Speak Your Truth' one with blues and greens has such clear blue eyes on that girl.. I quite love her the best at the moment. Meditative, healing and calming... that's the essence of these.
Meditative Healing Calming
Aura joined me for my morning cuppa... which I loved in between the cleaning.
bye for now,
love Denise xo
Gosh... if it wasn't for the lovely Tracy Verdogo keeping up with her blog promise whilst she's in NZ... I may well have forgotten mine tonight!!! I get so busy with thinking, and errands and stuff... this blog thing still isn't falling into place automatically.
I ended up driving those two paintings I was 'struggling' to finish... to be photographed today .. so that's some closure of a kind... I'm glad of that.
While waiting for scanning to be done.. I took myself to a delightful place for some tea :) Not all chai's are alike. I am better off with English Breakfast of Earl Grey next time I decided.
On my drive today with shuffle on my iphone... 'Dancin Daisy' card came up... she's from Tori Hartman's Color Wisdom Cards, and she's all about JOY. See if she's helpful for you too:
Dancin' Daisy represents a new phase in life, the acceleration of all the events that happen. Dancin' Daisy saisy, "Come to me and jump beyond what you belive, into a new possibility." The Daisy tells you to take action where you may not have previously.
Dancin' Daisy is the life energy. She is connected to enthusiasm. Dancin' Daisy is physical expansion and embodies in physical form the example we all seek. She represents a joyous time for you: a move, a job, or another significant change, such as a marriage. (It's no surprise then that I ran into the lovely Kim Morrison at the store.. she embodies this so well!)
This also signifies taking a risk that will work with faith and trust. This is the moment after the leap, when you cannot see where you will land. The Daisy is a reassurance that you will land on your feet; so keep the faith.
Dancin' Daisy also represents radiant health. The Great Spirits can only manifest through us if we honour the physical body we inhabit. This may mean that you need to adopt a good physical fitness regimen. Your will to heal yourself is great.
I'm seeing this as the new phase in my life.. where I'm reaching right out of my comfort zone... to push the boundaries and learn new things. ... like Blooming True in Bali!
I love daisy's.
bye for now,
love Denise xo
Oh gosh... I almost forgot to write today.. I thought of it this morning, this afternoon and again early evening and STILL I nearly didn't get to it!!! Memory issues are a bit of thing of late! I was given this 'key' by a lovely lady from my Cosmic Cowgirl community, she meditated on a bunch of keys she had and asked for the right one I needed. (yes... I'll have to go into that some time won't I)
So today... I've been in that daunting/challenging/irksome/teetering on the brink of relief stage of trying to pull some paintings into COMPLETION... where my inner critic, perfectionist, free spirited-artiste and tired self all vie for my attention and buffer me about like a mini tornado. It's seriously full-on inside my head when I'm 'trying' to finish for a 'deadline'. I'm not sure that will ever change or improve... but I'm willing to give it a red hot go... to retrain myself.... here's what I did today when I was just getting overrrrr it ... (besides taking a blurry photo of my tea and journal)
I went and boiled up some hari chai & water, added some ginger... little spoon of suger (out of honey) and some soy milk once it had boiled enough. And brought a teapot back to the studio and got my trusty 'you-can-write-anything-in-here' journal.. (based on the concept of morning pages by Julie Cameron.. I really don't get around to those much at all...) so i just grab my A5 notebook whenever i need to empty out the over-thinking thoughts and get a bit of relief from holding them all inside my head. Want to hear some messages from my Muse... this is quite private.. and she wrote in red.. which kindof reminds me of the red thread... so I liked that ...
Sweet Chai my love, Sweet chai...
True fact. That's what I wrote, stream of consciousness once I sat with my tea in hand.. and picked up the red pen. I then just vented whatever, whatever after that with purple pen haha.. and felt somewhat relieved for the time being. Did I go back and 'complete' those paintings.. NOPE... I had to dash off and pick up my daughter, run some errands, cook dinner.. and then watch Good Wife with P. ... So.. tomorrow.. I get to do it all again.
But I can be more mindful.. and re-read the little note from my Muse.. she's right you know.. I loved a saying once that said "Everything you want is downstream" (Esther Hicks) .. I know for the doubters that just sounds like total bonkers... but I'm a dreamy optimist... I love how that sounds.
bye for now,
love Denise xo
Last night I got to thinking about 'the underbelly' the things in my past/dna/experience that could or would be classified as the dark stuff, or painful or shadow stuff. And I wondered about sharing that here.. and you know... I decided, why not. I don't have to go into specifics for people to resonate or recognise these same things may have crossed their path too.. and to notice it doesn't have to be the whole story. A brief list .. growing up in a home with an alcoholic father, which fed into domestic violence, my sister brutally murdered when she was 41 - June '97, depression, mental illness in varying degrees in my family, 9 years in a cult-like church, ... all the 'usual suspects'. ... I thought these are some of the things women who come into my classes may have experienced... and I think it's ok for them to know I've been there too in some form or another.. either as witness to it or right in it myself.
I've just been listening to a random talk that came up on 'shuffle' (I have loooaaads of them.. so this should not come as a surprise to me) Amy Ahlers was interviewing Charlotte Kasl.. talking at one part about the 12 step AA program... and how Charlotte has developed a 16 step program.. and the one step that got to her 'I am powerless over this disease' was the very same one that I could just not cop when I tried to attend a meeting of Alanon or ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics) many years ago.
ADDICTION - COMPULSION - BAD HABIT
A real gem of an idea came up in their conversation that I quickly wrote down and wanted to share.
If there is an addiction, compulsion or bad habit, something I want to overcome in some way ... What is a really good tangible action step to take to help right here and how?
One would be to list the harmful consequences; all that it's costing you, ... maybe sleep, peace of mind, and your anxiety. Then make another list of all that you have to gain from letting go of it. Because it's always hard to let go of these things. That's why Charlotte developed the empowerment model she said, because it builds up pleasure and joy and all the strengths in life because you have these to go to - people don't let go of something if there's no 'place' to go generally ... get to know the compulsive voice inside you ... what if you didn't have to get so anxious. I think painting and art journaling have become very powerful and positive 'places' for me to go in my journey.
I'm coming from a much stronger place these days.. but I have had my fair share of down times. And one thing that sprung to mind when I considered what are my addictions, compulsions or bad habits... was ... my lack of boundaries with my iPhone - fb and email checking... so I can make those lists.. What's is costing me.. and What do I have to gain from letting it go...and just start there... bringing awareness to something is well on the way to healing or solving it.
bye for now,
My husband remarked to me this morning that it was 25 years since Expo '88 was in Brisbane... and I realised it's been 25 years since I moved to Australia!!! I was just 19yrs old and I arrived in May '88 and Expo was in full swing and I bought a season pass ... but I'd known since I was 12 that I wanted to live here. My three sisters shouted me a trip over when I was 12 years old... and they took me to Stradbroke Island where I fell madly in love with the golden sandy beaches of this great country, and Queensland in particular. I've become an Australian citizen, I married an Australian..and my two daughters were born here... so I'm more Australian then Kiwi these days it would seem. Except for the occasional accent that even the guy on the phone at the bank recognised recently and said 'Oh it's all about where you were at the age of 6'.
I wish I lived closer to my Mum... she's in NZ. She does a crossword most days "to keep her brain active" she tells me.
The view from Pt Cartwright... where we walk in the mornings... it's not hard to see why I love it here!!
bye for now,
Ohhhh... this is a commitment... so... I can't just slink off on a day where things were all a bit *&%&#@ so... what can I say today... I really don't feel inclined to make my blog toooo personal.. there's no need for that right now... I get a bit concerned with over-sharing and opening myself up to vulnerability... so I'll have to ease into that... and family stuff may always be out of bounds.. and that's fair enough. Some topics are totally ok for me to rant and rave about... and for the most part I aim for my blog to be more about the Art I guess. That's what I think today anyhow. I do like the option to change my mind. :)
Ok.. so here's some of what I've been doing today... including stuffing up a face and TRYING to get it back... making her mouth like 'the joker' at one point... at least Aura is happy, with her new cozy Hoodie for the winter. and I'll have another try at that face tomorrow.
at least Aura is happy.
Luckily all is not lost... because I'm really liking this one. These are a series of 3 paintings that are going in a local art show very soon... hence... stressy... get them finished feeling... is apparent and NOT HELPFUL REALLY.
those apps that make your paintings look more vibrant and warm are great.. but then you can't help but compare...
I'm keeping it short.. and snappy.. not very sweet today...
love Denise xo
p.s. ... here's a video of Esther Hicks... I was introduced to her and Jerry's work about 6 years ago... and listened to hours and hours of it back then... and...just now (6pm.. later in the day from that blog post) .. I listened in to this while making dinner... she's got lots of helpful stuff. xo
Last Sunday I ventured down to Mango Hill in Brisbane and met 12 lovely women and girls and spent the afternoon with them as they each created and played on a canvas... judging by the fact that... when the chocolate brownies were ready, freshly baked out of the oven! (insert smell of delicious chocolate'ness) nobody moved away from their table immediately! I think they enjoyed it :) The group was mostly Mother's with their daughter's which was sooo special to see, and even a three generational group.. pictured top left, what a special memory making afternoon for myself and them I'm sure. I loved the clarity and joy the little artist had when I asked her about what she was painting there next to her mermaid.. "Oh they're Swimmers" she said.
Being faced with a blank canvas can be scary... not so for the younger ones in our midst.. they take to painting and creative play like a duck to water as far as I can tell. But us grown ups we need sometimes to find a 'way in' I made a few suggestions on the day... and I had a list or two of ideas in my hand.. but in case you'd like to have a pic to keep... I'll put some below.
I often make my 'to do' lists in this kind of way.. with a task on each petal... it feels so much more doable.
I'm going to sign off there,
Sunday.. lunch time... and going to see Robert Downey jnr in Iron Man 3 later!
Oh dear, day 4 and I'm in a 'meh' kind of mood and not sure what to talk about. It seems this blogging thing is catchy as the lovely Tracy Verdugo.. and a new friend I just made Stephanie Gagos over on the Magic Mixed Art Community page on fb having both been inpsired by Flora Bowley are joining in the 'self given challenge' to blog for 30 days or so in a row.
I really neeeed to spend some more time on a painting I've entered in an art show(pic below) .. delivery date for finished works is Mon 13th May... I've heard it said before by artists if we don't book our work into these things we may never complete a piece. I've got a commission formulating it's design in my head... and the BIG course I'm doing at the moment (Color of Woman) where we're focusing on putting into words our Vision Quest for our current 'time and space we find ourselves living and feeling into' Talk about... growing into yourself! I can't believe the little incremental changes that have been going on in my life for the last 12 months or so... I have even begun to practice recording myself speaking into a little video.. just with the iPhone for now... because I've seen so many wonderful teacher/artists out in the web doing so. I was thinking it will be a great way to introduce to you new workshops or classes I'm thinking of doing... you can get a sense of what I'll be on about..and see if you like the feel of it.
"Speak Your Truth"
I've named it 'Speak Your Truth" ... that just seems to be a bit of a reocurring theme for me at the moment... learning how to speak about all the WONDERFUL things I'm learning... it may come as a surprise to you but when I'm speaking to a group and I realise they're actually listening to my every word... I get a bit freaked out on the inside! (I think I learned this from teenage years when it came time for speechs in english.. I would go beetroot red and wish to die and dissolve throught the floor of the dumb uninspiring class room) ... the reference to the chakra colour of blue relates to the throat so.. that's how it got it's name. (oh great a typo imprinted into the pic.. whateverrr)
Queen of Her Own Heart
Spending time with the Muse while painting Queen of Her Own Heart... she and I cleared the table of all the extra's and left her with the essentials for now... I've done her eyes some more but they really look too heavily 'eyelined' at the moment.. it's like what happens to me sometimes if I put make up on in dim light and too far away from the mirror to really notice the result! ... as I say... work in progress. and Noses!! what THE?
I guess I'll head downstairs and gather some lunch.. and see what this GORGEOUS sunny afternoon holds... and shake myself out of the doldrums. It's nice to have kept my 'self promise' and shown up here.
I've been on the computer since about 7.30am.. this can also be the life of 'full time artist' we don't "paint all day, aren't you so lucky" ... yes I am blessed, but no... I do not get to paint all day everyday.
Today I have been gathering 'evidence' and making a report back to council about how I used the RADF grant I won, I really like 'closure' of such things.... so I know I'll feel the relief after I'm done. I thought I would share a couple of 'snapshots' of things I did. One of my new favourite things to have discovered in golden's crackle paste.. see the tree below.
I had already done the background, and had a pretty unimpressive tree shape on there... but after experimenting with the crackle paste OH WOW!!! I found a new little love. :)
below are some resuls of PLAYING! yes... playing.. with crackle past, fluid acrylics, gels, glass bead gel and stencils.. and iridescent bronze is another favourite of mine.
Time for me to clear away the clutter on my desk.. and get ready for my Color of Woman live call... the more I learn and glean from this course the richer and deeper my art and world are becoming. More on that another day.
bye for now,
love Denise xo
.... today I just took more pics at the beach... and my little dog... I knoooooow I'm not intending to do a blog about my dog ok.. I'm noticing... and it's my eldest daughter's birthday today so I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy about her. :)
I have to say, having a little dog has changed our lives ... we didn't used to make an effort to get to the beach for walks each day together before having her (I used to just go alone) ... and having her be SO excited EVERY SINGLE morning is the best.. and I especially love seeing her like in the pic above with her GIANT shadow... because she really does think she is much bigger than she looks. haha... P named her Aura..... maybe she's got a giant aura haha.
Instead of staying inside with the borning morning tv show.. I stepped outside with my breakfast cuppa... it was too hot to sit out there to write... but I enjoyed the birdsong.. and all is well.
I'm getting off here in the desire to get some more done on a painting or two.
I was awake at 3.30am again!!! so I did a little on this painting... and now that I am more awake... I'll go ahead and do some more... it's my Queen of her Own Heart painting... and she is helping me decide on what she wants on her tea table.
Have a beautiful day wherever you are.
bye for now,
love Denise xo
Books I Love
“There are very few human beings who receive the truth, complete and staggering, by instant illumination. Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment, on a small scale, by successive developments, cellularly, like a laborious mosaic.”